“Borderline personality disorder is a mental illness that severely impacts a person’s ability to manage their emotions. This loss of emotional control can increase impulsivity, affect how a person feels about themselves, and negatively impact their relationships with others.”
– National Institute of Mental Health
Symptoms of Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) include the following.
Fear of abandonment
Unstable relationships
Unclear or shifting self-image
Impulsive, self-destructive behaviors
Self-harm
Extreme emotional swings
Chronic feelings of emptiness
Explosive anger
Feeling suspicious or out of touch with reality
I have some of these symptoms but not all of them all of the time. I do fear my significant other leaving me through death. At this point we have enough history together that I don’t believe he will leave me willingly like I used to.
My self-image is in constant flux. I don’t know if I am a good person or a bad person much of the time. I often question my state of mind – whether I am mentally unstable or not, and whether my assessment of reality is true or not. I constantly seek reassurance from my significant other on these matters because I don’t trust my own judgement.
I used to have unstable relationships and impulsive self-destructive behaviors, including self harm, when I was younger. I still have the compulsion to self-harm when I become intensely overwhelmed by my emotions but I rarely give into it as it passes very quickly.
I have extreme emotional swings often within the same day and sometimes within the same hour! I don’t usually understand why this is happening or where the trigger is coming from. Although mindfulness helps me realize that it almost always has something to do with my thoughts – the story I am telling myself about events happening outside of me and within.
I do have chronic feelings of emptiness, often feeling like I have no purpose in life; constantly fighting feelings of loneliness and boredom.
I have problems with explosive anger when I feel like people have been unfair or unjust with myself or others. I have learned to curtail my anger in most other situations but those in which I become judgemental and intolerant my rage can be destructive to myself and my significant other who has to bear the brunt of my complaining and lamenting.
I am suspicious and question people’s motives ALL. OF. THE. TIME. I take things personally and tend to put myself at the center of the universe which makes everyone’s actions about ME instead of what they truly are which is about themselves and what they are dealing with or bringing to the situation based on their own beliefs, values, and histories. This is something that pains me most days and it is quite the hard habit to break.
I practice mindfulness, including in meditation; I pray to my higher self which helps me gain insight into my feelings and behaviors. I do movement therapy including stretching, yoga poses, and Tai chi. I deal with this mental illness along with several others in addition to chronic pain, so I suppose I am doing fairly well in spite of these things. I am always looking to do better, however, so if you have any suggestions please leave them in the comments and tell me if you relate to anything I said in this article. Thank you.
The times I feel most understood in terms of my bipolar disorder are when I read #bipolarclub posts on Twitter. I don’t think people can really understand what it is like to have bipolar disorder unless they have it themselves. When people talk about their symptoms and their struggles with bipolar disorder, I feel so understood and less alone in my own issues in dealing with it.
I also have a sibling who has bipolar disorder and she and I have had many good chuckles over how similar we are in our reactions to life in light of our bipolar disorder. It’s important to connect with other people who are going through the same symptoms as you are, so that you don’t feel like you’re the only one experiencing them. For me, connecting with others who have bipolar disorder makes me feel like I’m a part of something valid and that I’m not just “crazy.”
When do you feel most understood in terms of your bipolar disorder? Tell me about it in the comments. Also, follow me on Twitter.
Everyone has bad days, but when yours start to negatively affect your relationships it may be a sign of bipolar disorder. I can be irritated for no apparent reason for days at a time and this is often a symptom of mixed mania for me where I am hypomanic and depressed at the same time. My baseline is low depression so when I get a burst of creativity or energy that I have trouble acting on I get irritable quickly.
If this happens to you, learning mindfulness and anger management techniques might be helpful. It also might be a good idea to discuss it with your doctor.
Nine months ago I posted an article on Dialectic Behavior Therapy (DBT) and I ended it with “More to come…” Well, more never came. I had started reading a DBT workbook around this time and joining in on a weekly DBT Twitter space as well, which is what inspired me to write about the topic. I quickly got bored with the book and as a result also lost interest in the space on Twitter and didn’t give the article or topic a second thought.
Having grandiose ideas and abandoning them before they are finished is a common symptom in people with bipolar disorder.
“Having a house full of half-completed projects is a hallmark of bipolar disorder. People who can harness their energy when they are in a hypomanic phase can be really productive. Those who can’t often go from task to task, planning grand, unrealistic projects that are never finished before moving on to something else.
“They can be quite distractible and may start a million things and never finish them,” says Dr. Don Malone, the director of the Center for Behavioral Health and chair of the Department of Psychiatry at Cleveland Clinic, in Ohio.” https://www.cbsnews.com/pictures/bipolar-disorder-10-subtle-signs/
Do you experience this problem? I always have plans to post a blog every week and my last one was seven months ago so you can see how well it works out for me.
988 is now available in the United States to contact if you are in a mental health, substance use, or suicide crisis! Please pass this information along.
Dialectical Behavior Therapy’s (DBT) premise is that two seemingly opposite things can be true at the same time. For example, my parents did the best they knew how when raising me and they negatively affected my emotional development.
DBT trains the mind to think with a good balance between reason and emotion, calling this the “wise mind.” It also can keep you out of all or nothing or black and white thinking. There are many shades of grey with everything in life.
There are four main tenets of DBT. They are Distress Tolerance, Mindfulness, Emotional Regulation, and Interpersonal Skills.
Distress Tolerance and Radical Acceptance
Distress Tolerance includes an idea called “Radical Acceptance” where you fully acknowledge the present moment reality. This does not equal condonement. Radical acceptance places you in a position of being able to make a plan to elicit changes in your life because you cannot change anything if you aren’t fully engaged in the acceptance of what currently is.
Distress Tolerance skills include distraction and self-soothing. Distract by engaging in pleasurable, non-destructive activities, focusing on helping others, doing chores, counting breaths or anything you can see, or distract by removing yourself from the situation.
Self-soothe any of your senses: smell, sight, sound, taste and touch. Use any input that makes you feel good that is non-destructive and not harmful to you or anyone else.
R.E.S.T.
Above all, make sure to use the “Rest” technique in any situation that is upsetting to you at the start. Relax (R), Evaluate the facts (E), Set an intention (S), Take action (T). The intention and take action steps could include some ideas from the distress tolerance skills.
We are half way through Mental Health Awareness Month. Awareness for mental health is so important because people die everyday from poor mental health. People can’t work due to poor mental health or take care of their family or get out of bed. We have to bring awareness to this in order to normalize it in such a way that those who find themselves in such situations don’t hesitate to get professional help.
Twenty percent of adults in the United States experience a mental health condition in a given year. This topic deserves our attention and consideration. People are suffering and need help.
– Share the following mental health facts taken from nami.org with permission.
– Host a Facebook or Instagram Live with an expert or a person with real life experience to discuss how people can manage their mental health or practice self-care.
– Share a video of what mental health means to you. Use video sharing apps like TikTok or Instagram reels to create videos to post on your social media profiles.
– Use the following social media hashtags for Mental Health Awareness Month:
#NotAlone
#MentalHealthMonth
#MHM
– Promote NAMI Helpline’s contact information and hours of availability as a resource for people seeking mental health support. Monday – Friday 8:00 a.m. to 8:00 p.m. ET. 800-950-NAMI (6264). info@nami.org nami.org/Help
How are you going to help increase mental health awareness this month?
Today is World Maternal Mental Health Day, which purpose is to draw attention to the mental health concerns for mothers and families. The changes that pregnancy and having children brings in life makes women more vulnerable to mental illness.
I was first diagnosed with depression not long after my first child’s birth. I was later diagnosed with type 2 bipolar disorder after the birth of my second child.
Worldwide, as many as 1 in 5 women experience some type of perinatal mood and anxiety disorder. These disorders include postpartum depression, postpartum anxiety, postpartum obsessive compulsive disorder, postpartum bipolar, and postpartum psychosis. Symptoms can appear at any time during pregnancy and the first 12 months after childbirth.
Health professionals and friends and relatives of new moms need to ask the mom how she really is feeling and encourage her to seek help if she is struggling.
Stress is physical, emotional, or psychological tension felt as a result of an event or thought that causes feelings of frustration, anger, or anxiety. In short bursts, stress can be helpful, like in getting you out of a dangerous situation or helping you meet a deadline. When chronic, however, it can be harmful to your health and contribute to the development of conditions such as
High blood pressure
Heart disease
Diabetes
Obesity
Depression or anxiety
Skin problems, such as acne or eczema
Menstrual problems
Common causes of stress include
Getting married or divorced
Starting a new job
The death of a spouse or close family member
Getting laid off
Retiring
Having a baby
Money problems
Moving
Having a serious illness
Problems at work
Problems at home
Signs of chronic stress include
Diarrhea or constipation
Forgetfulness
Frequent aches and pains
Headaches
Lack of energy or focus
Sexual problems
Stiff jaw or neck
Tiredness
Trouble sleeping or sleeping too much
Upset stomach
Use of alcohol or drugs to relax
Weight loss or gain
Sometimes stress can be managed by getting the right amount of sleep, talking problems over with a trusted friend, getting regular exercise and proper nutrition, and generally taking good care of yourself. Other times if you find yourself having panic attacks, feeling overwhelmed for weeks on end, or unable to function at work or home, you should probably contact your doctor or mental health professional for some help.
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